


Standards

by MovesLikeBucky



Series: Tumblr Ficlets Based On Art [4]
Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Inspired by Fanart, M/M, warlock's birthday party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:22:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23385913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MovesLikeBucky/pseuds/MovesLikeBucky
Summary: He's a demon.  He has standards.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: Tumblr Ficlets Based On Art [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1668703
Comments: 28
Kudos: 75





	Standards

**Author's Note:**

  * For [YamiSnuffles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/YamiSnuffles/gifts).



> Yoooooo more fic based on art because I cannot stop myself. Though this is also based on a discussion in the SOSH discord about how Crowley's waiter uniform is so much different than all the other ones. Because he has standards.
> 
> Based on [this lovely demon boy](https://yamisnuffles.tumblr.com/post/613964229190483968/i-like-that-crowley-took-the-caterer-outfit-and) by Yamisnuffles

“Really, Crowley, stop fidgeting with it.”

“Can’t! Doesn’t fit right.”

“Nothing you wear fits right, have you looked in a mirror lately?”

It’s Warlock’s 11th birthday, and Aziraphale has been sequestered into one of the downstairs guest rooms to get into costume. He’s staring into a mirror, drawing on some silly mustache that he still thinks is necessary despite it being the Year of our Dark Lord Twenty Fucking Nineteen.

Crowley is, incidentally, looking into the same mirror, placed over a chest of drawers like some kind of make-shift vanity, adjusting the cuffs of his blinding white jacket. A bit of demonic influence had the original magician and the waiter he’d been making eyes at ditching work for a snog at the cinema; leaving them the opening to be at Warlocks’ birthday party unimpeded.

Except for this blasted uniform. The fit is all wrong. The jacket is too long and starched horribly, the button up shirt is thin and scratchy. The trousers are absolutely appalling and were probably made by some underpaid soul in China.

“It’s just a uniform, Crowley, it’s not like you’ll have to wear it long.”

“Easy for you to say,” Crowley says as he adjusts the suffocating polyester tie. As though he’d ever be seen in something as gauche as _polyester_. Makes his skin crawl. And that’s usually a job reserved for Hastur’s poor excuse for an aroma. “You get to play magician, I'm stuck handing out hors d’oeuvres.”

“And I’m sure you’ll be the most handsome waiter there whether your trousers are tailored or not, dear.”

Crowley makes a noise not unlike that of a cat screeching, but also a bit more like a tire squeal. Stupid polyester. Stupid itchy thin shirt. Stupid birthday party. Stupid angel with his stupid plans and his stupid magic act. Calling him handsome. Stupid. The whole lot of it.

He growls in frustration and snaps his fingers. The shirt immediately replaces itself with one that actually knows how to respect whoever is wearing it. The tie shifts from itchy polyester to silk. The jacket has the decency to turn into something a bit more Italian in flavor with much nicer lines that accentuate his height much better than whatever that _other_ jacket was trying to do. And of course, the trousers immediately jump to attention and tailor themselves to his preferred cut, which can be summed up as ‘How did he get those on? Must’ve needed a tub of coconut oil and at least one pair of pliers.’

Aziraphale looks at him through the mirror and tuts. “Is that really necessary, Crowley?”

“You of all people should know, angel,” Crowley says as straightens out the cuffs of the jacket sleeves. “I _have_ standards."

**Author's Note:**

> Come hang out with us in the [Soft Omens Snuggle House](https://discord.gg/QU5krqq)! Where it's all softness all the time! Or you can find me on [Tumblr](https://moveslikebucky.tumblr.com)! ^_^


End file.
